By Neda Kacarevic
You guys, I heard a legend about the History Channel a while back that I simply must share because it has haunted me ever since. I have spent countless hours mulling it over in my head, and wondering whether or not it could possibly be true, but that hasn’t been enough. No. Today is the day that I address this legend.
Are you ready for it?
Well, according to the legend, apparently a long time ago, in a land far far away, The History Channel dealt with, well, actual history! Can you believe it? Actual shows about actual history! Crazy, I know!
Now, I warn you, this may be just a rumor – an old folktale if you will — however, there seems to be some evidence behind this theory. You see, behind all of the Nazi-World War II documentaries, not to mention the shows about aliens and Swamp People, there exist actual remains of old shows and documentaries that were broadcast on The History Channel which dealt with history! Real, factual, history!
I know what you may be thinking to yourself, “Can be this true? Is this real life?” The answer is yes! It is true!
Okay, okay, I’ll stop being so sarcastic about it all, but seriously: when did the History Channel become so unhistorical? When did it begin to shift away from history and towards Alien theories and World War II/Nazis? I mean, could it be that the History Channel has succumbed to “The Man?” More importantly, do viewers really take the shows they broadcast now about aliens as actual history, or do they have more common sense than that? If they do take it seriously, then should the History Channel take responsibility for the misconception, seeing as it is called the History Channel? Well, should they?
Yes, I think so, but let us start with the first question.
Who is this ominous “man?” Well, it’s you and me, and audiences alike! “What?” Well, simply put, in order to make money, the History Channel has to appeal to the audience. The audience doesn’t really want to think too hard when it comes down to watching TV, and besides, many find history boring. Therefore, in order for the History Channel to stay afloat, it has to provide the audience with shows that they would be interested in. Unfortunately, we would rather watch a documentary about aliens, then about some revolution. Therefore, aliens it is for the History Channel. (I’m kind of surprised they haven’t done a thing about the Zombie Apocalypse, but maybe they have and I just haven’t seen it.) Therefore, we are the “man” because we demand that the History Channel broadcasts more entertaining shows, not historically accurate ones. Yuck! Real history for entertainment?! That’s like eating broccoli for dessert – no fun whatsoever.
Anyway, it saddens me to think that the human race has come to this, but apparently there are those that take the History Channel very seriously. “What? Really?!” Yes, yes indeed my dear friends. The fact that the History Channel still calls itself the history channel is humorous in itself, but the fact that some viewers actually believe that stories about aliens and “secret passageways” are true, is hilarious. However, to be fair, these shows are being shown on a channel that identifies itself with history. Whether you have common sense, or not, it is easy to be fooled by its name. Is it really fair to mislead people like that? No, of course not. Therefore, I believe that the History Channel should take some responsibility for the fact that some poor nine year old will now believe that the Stonehenge was a secret passageway for Nazi-Zombie-Aliens to enter our world.
Don’t you agree? Should they not change their name? I understand that it is now part of a brand, but a little rebranding never hurt anyone.